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Freaky Tales (2024)

A retro, illustrated movie poster for Freaky Tales with a vibrant, '80s-inspired art style. In the center, a man in a blue jacket with a large 'W' on the chest stares intensely forward. He is flanked by actor Pedro Pascal in a leather jacket looking over his shoulder, and actor Ben Mendelsohn in a suit holding a shotgun. Other characters stand in the background on either side, all set against a dark city skyline. Above them, a jagged bolt of green and purple lightning cracks across the sky.

Plot Summary: Set against the vibrant and chaotic backdrop of Oakland, California, in 1987, Freaky Tales weaves together four interconnected stories inspired by the city's culture from that era. Narrated by Oakland rap legend Too Short, the film unfolds over a single day and night, following a diverse group of characters on a collision course.

Directors: Ryan Fleck, Anna Boden
Screenplay: Ryan Fleck, Anna Boden
Music: Raphael Saadiq
Cinematography: Jac Fitzgerald
Starring:
Pedro Pascal as Clint
Ben Mendelsohn as The Guy
Jay Ellis as Sleepy Floyd
Dominique Thorne as Barbie
Normani as Entice

 A header image for a movie review from "Freddy's Movie Review." On the left is a blue-tinted photo of the blog's author, Freddy, smiling while wearing sunglasses and giving a thumbs-up. The text "freddy's movie review" is on the right.
***SPOILER ALERT***

Dude, I Think I'm Too Old For This


So I decided to check out a popular new movie, and dude... I think I'm too old for this sh**. The film is set in 1987 and uses all the camera tricks and cinematography to go for that '80s style, but I never once felt that vibe. It just felt too modern. One of the reasons for that was the casting for the punk rock scenes. It felt like an all inclusive 2024 version of an '80s punk show, not the real deal. That, along with some poor wardrobe choices, shattered the illusion for me and made it feel like it was trying way too hard. This inauthenticity was strongest in the first chapter, which was also heavy on gimmicky effects and little animations that did nothing for me. I didn't find them cool at all; it all just screamed "we're trying so hard to be cool," and it fell completely flat.

Check the lame fight scene between punks and skins below.

Rappers, a Weak Villain, and a Touch of Pascal


Moving into the second act, I'll admit, I digged the rapping duo. It was probably the highlight for me. This is also where we're introduced to the big villain of the movie, "The Guy," played by Ben Mendelsohn. Unfortunately, he delivers a mediocre and totally forgettable performance as a character with zero impact. The third act is by far the most interesting, mostly because Pedro Pascal shows up and brings a more serious tone, making things feel a little less naive and childish. (By the time I'm writing this, by the way, I still have no clue what that number one movie on Tom Hanks' list is that they keep referencing).

Below you can watch when The Guy first appears to order some Ice Cream

Brainless Violence and a "Teenage" Script


Let's get to the action in the fourth act: it's just stupid. It's brainless, childish violence that makes no sense. For example, in a climactic showdown, none of these bad-ass motherf***ers were carrying guns. Really?! If you want something violent and stylish that actually works, just go watch Kill Bill. This, I am not recommending. The skinhead villains feel like simplistic cartoon characters; I get that we're supposed to hate Nazis and killing them is heroic, but can't we just stop with the endless violence for a bit? Honestly, I thought this movie was directed and written by a couple of teenagers. I was shocked to see the filmmakers are in their forties. Come on, guys. Grow up. I also didn't get the comedy aspect at all, I didn't find a single thing worth laughing at. It's a totally forgettable and skippable movie.

Here's a glimpse at the overly stylized violence that feels more cartoonish than impactful.

🎥 Cinematography (4/10):

Tries desperately to capture an '80s aesthetic but feels like a modern film with Instagram filters slapped on. The gimmicky visual effects detract rather than enhance.

📖 Story (3/10):

Disjointed anthology that never coheres into something meaningful. Individual segments range from forgettable to painful.

🎬 Direction (2/10):

Feels like the work of much younger filmmakers who haven't developed beyond their adolescent sensibilities. Lacks restraint and maturity.

👥 Characters (3/10):

One-dimensional caricatures rather than people. The villains particularly suffer from cartoon-level development.

💥 Visual Effects (2/10):

Gratuitous animations and effects that add nothing but distraction. Trying too hard to be stylish.

🎭 Acting (4/10):

Pascal brings some gravity to his scenes, but Mendelsohn is wasted, and many others seem miscast in their roles.

💬 Dialogue (2/10):

Clunky, on-the-nose, and lacking any subtlety. Never feels authentic to the era it's portraying.

🌍 Setting/Atmosphere (3/10):

Fails to capture the genuine feel of 1987 Oakland. Instead delivers a sanitized, modern interpretation that rings false.

🎵 Music (4/10):

The hip-hop segments show some promise, but overall the soundtrack feels like a superficial pastiche of '80s sounds.

😄 Entertainment Value (2/10):

A tedious experience with few redeeming moments. Neither the comedy nor the action lands effectively.

A close-up image of the Star Wars character Yoda. He has a calm, knowing expression and is wearing his tan robes. Overlaid text, written in his signature inverted syntax, reads: "Trying to hard you are. Stop you must." In the bottom right corner, smaller text says, "final score: 29/100."
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