Plot Summary:
In the 28th century, special operatives Valerian and Laureline maintain order throughout human territories, assigned to investigate a dark, growing threat at the center of the sprawling metropolis Alpha.
Director: Luc Besson
Producers: Virginie Besson-Silla
Screenplay: Luc Besson
Starring:
Dane DeHaan as Valerian
Cara Delevingne as Laureline
Clive Owen as Commander ArΓΌn Filitt
Rihanna as Bubble
Ethan Hawke as Jolly the Pimp
Herbie Hancock as Defence Minister
Kris Wu as Sergeant Neza
Music: Alexandre Desplat
Cinematography: Thierry Arbogast
Editing: Julien Rey
Director: Luc Besson
Producers: Virginie Besson-Silla
Screenplay: Luc Besson
Starring:
Dane DeHaan as Valerian
Cara Delevingne as Laureline
Clive Owen as Commander ArΓΌn Filitt
Rihanna as Bubble
Ethan Hawke as Jolly the Pimp
Herbie Hancock as Defence Minister
Kris Wu as Sergeant Neza
Music: Alexandre Desplat
Cinematography: Thierry Arbogast
Editing: Julien Rey
HOT DEAL
*Live prices & availability verified on Amazon
⚠️ SPOILER ALERT ⚠️
Overloaded and Underwhelming
And we’re back in the shit! I’m starting to get in a hurry to finish Luc Besson’s movies. "Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets" is boring, boring, boring, because there are too many aliens, too many gadgets, too many costumes, too much imagination! I reached a point of exhaustion one hour into the movie. The universe is kind of stupid. For example, how can such a primitive tribal culture be part of the great city of a thousand boring things? Why would there be a diplomatic problem with them? So stupid.
Lackluster Leads and Annoying Performances
Now to the main issue: the actors. What an uncharismatic couple we have here! Especially the guy who sounds like a younger, weaker, uglier, and skinnier Keanu Reeves. The kid doesn’t have any charisma and is just damn annoying. This seems like a fad today with male action heroes, I’m thinking Tom Holland, that guy from Dune. They look like total skinny bitches. Sorry for being harsh, but I bet his mamma would rebuke everything I’ve just said. And then you get Rihanna, who I detest as well. I can only think about umbrellas when I hear her name. The only good actor with something interesting to say is Ethan Hawke, but unfortunately, he's a minor character. The movie hasn’t ended and I’m already writing my review on my phone because I just don’t care about what’s going to happen. It’s just too predictable.
Visuals Can't Save the Snooze Fest
The graphics are good to look at, but as a gamer, nothing in this movie can impress me when I’ve already been immersed in beautifully alien worlds. I just paused to come back to the Major’s explanation for his attack on Mui... The economy and sanctions! Total shit story. Get a writer Luc!!! The music is just average orchestral music, boring as the pictures. The pace is not as bad as in Arthur and AdΓ¨le Blanc-"Que Saco", but still feels off. Here I am writing this review and the movie on my TV isn’t over yet... What a long boring mess. Now they’re just shooting at each other... Again. Probably if you are 10 and never seen a sci-fi action/adventure movie, this will be a good watch. But why do that when you can just watch Firefly series and end with the beautiful movie Serenity!
Our blog is currently being updated regularly!
Comments
Post a Comment